Babbles
by SupremeMotherHen
Summary: Amy has a proposition.


"Are you doing anything this Friday?"

Amy did her best impression of a person "acting natural". The act would have been convincing if her eyes weren't blinking rapidly, her posture wasn't as ridged as her frame allowed, and the fact that she just about sweat through her shirt.

"Why?"

Rosa managed to fit more suspicion and disdain in that one word than a person should have been able to. Nothing good ever came from people asking Rosa about her plans. Rosa deduced that Amy either wanted a favor or was being incredibly nosy; both of which Rosa hated.

"I have reservations for this quaint restaurant that opened three blocks from here, and I was wondering if you would like to join me."

Rosa stared Amy down, waiting for the catch. Amy looked about ready to keel over—there had to have been a catch.

"For two." Amy continued.

"I have a reservation for two people and I'm only one people – person so I need one other person to make two people. Because one plus one more is two. But you know that already because you are a very intelligent woman."

Gina and Jake stood outside of the break room, listening in on Amy's attempt to ask Rosa out. So far, she had forgone both of their advice.

"I have never seen anyone crash and burn this deliciously." Gina whispered.

"I told her to rap it, but no one listens to me. It would have been amazing. Just think of the grammatically correct rhymes she would drop." Jake whispered back.

"That would be amazing."

Their conversation was interrupted by more of Amy's embarrassing attempt at procuring a date.

"You do not have to accept, you know that, right?"

She didn't give Rosa time to respond before words continued to leak from her mouth, at an alarming rate.

"Of course you know that. You don't need me to tell you about consent and entitlement. Because I, in no way feel entitled to your time. I can accept your decline – if you were going to decline. Which would be fine. Not that I'm telling you it will be fine as if I'm giving you permission but I'm reiterating and verbalizing what you already know. In your head. Because there is a lot going on in there. Because you are a smart woman. And I'm not saying that you're smart for a woman, I am just stating that you are smart and also just happen to be a woman."

Amy had definitely sweat through her shirt and her muscles began to ache from the ridged position she was stuck in.

"Dummies," Rosa barked. "Stop eavesdropping."

Rosa peered over to the door in time to see Jake and Gina scurry away as fast as they could.

"And you."

Amy choked back a sob. Here it was. She was going to receive the worst rejection ever because she couldn't keep her damn mouth shut.

"I'll need to go home to get changed, but I'll meet you back here at 8."

"I completely accept your decision, thank you for allowing me to waste a few minutes of your life. I appreciate it very much."

Amy only made it to the door before she realized what had happened.

"Wait, you accepted!"

"Nothing gets by you, genius."

"I just thought you would reject me so I was preparing a rejection statement in my head while you were talking. It's a quick-thinking technique I'm learning in my captain training"

Amy beamed, somewhat proud of herself for the quick and efficient response, no matter how wrong it was.

"So your listening skills are shit? You're not exactly talking yourself up here."

Rosa's smirk was hopefully a sign of her being playful, so Amy pressed on.

"I have a lot of skills that will come in handy Friday night."

Amy made her way back to her desk before realization hit. She ran back to the break room to catch Rosa.

"I now realize how sexual that may have come across and – "

"Don't worry about it, Santiago."

Rosa met Amy at the threshold of the room. She leaned in close, giving a perfect view down her slightly unbuttoned shirt.

"I like sexual."

If it were literally possible for people to spontaneously melt, the wink and smirk combo Rosa served before she made her way over to her won desk, would have been the cause of Amy's demise.

Amy stood stock still for a few moments. She would have been there longer if Captain Holt hadn't told her to get back to work.

Friday night would be the death of her. But what a way to go.


End file.
